Shit like this is why I despise pitchfork. Does anyone else know of any bullshit p4k reviews?
>>55310307Any of their prog reviews, especially Tool and TMV
>>55310333that's because tool is a 2/10 band
>>55310333Nice tripsI bet 20 bucks when Frances the mute gets reissued is whatever many years it'll be 8+ and they'll be embarrassed of their previous review.
They gave one of the best Sonic Youth albums a 0.0 because the writer was from Chicago.
Yet theyll give Kanye West a fucking 9.8! Who the fuck are these people?
I read Brent DiCrescenzo's Kid A review once a month.
>>55310377kanye's actually pretty good bruh open yr mindmy fave bad review is this one:http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/13852-up-from-below/About 3/4 of the review is arguing that is a bad album because alex ebert was in a bad punk band once.Edward sharpe isn't great but shit that's some dumbass logic. it's at least a 7.5
White Stripes) 6.9Nine Inch Nails) 2.0Metallica) 0.8Blur) 9.0Franz Ferdinand) 9.1Tool) 1.9Yea, Brent TOTALLY isnt a biased fucking asshole. Sure, lets give THAT guy the prog and industrial!
what the fuckthis isn't even the first time they panned them
>>55310362>le tool is bad memeYou're just saying this shit to fit in you faggot. Tool as well accepted back when metal was not a meme yet on /mu/ untill that review came out. Stop being a drone.
>>55310385HAHAHAHAHAHAH every time
>>55310489>Blur) 9.0fucking yikes
>>55310365doubt it. awful reviews like that probably mean they have personal problems with the band, not that they genuinely think the music is bad
NIN is trash so stfuAlso How I Loved You
>>55310489>tool 1.9Hipsters don't even like tool? Christ.
>>55310605Are there any people who genuinely like Tool then?
>>55310634Fuck off
>>55310634there are people in this thread right now who unironically listen to shit like tool and linkin park. you share a board with these ppl
>>55310634>Sold out tour>Shitloads of copies sold world wide>Played on the biggest stages ever>LMAO HOW CAN PEOPLE LIKE EM XDDDSeriously just get over it, Tool are well appreciated by most drone and prog rock/metal fans.
this shit
>>55310678>Comparing Tool to Linkin Park>Not even the same genre>Implying you've ever listened to a full Tool Album Am I cool yet guys????
>>55310554nah tool sux lmao
>>55310601>NIN>TrashWow, I didnt think people were this tasteless.
>>55310707This is the only AnCo album that I actually enjoy. Not worth a 9.6 tho. Strong 8 imo
The dumbest review on any topic ever written: http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/329-relationship-of-command/
>>55310678>tool and linkin parkyea those are comparable, ok friendo
>>55310715>Confirming his point Good job dumbfuck>inb4 le post-irony memeFull retard
rekq'd
>>55310740I don't understand how anybody can take p4k seriously when things like this exist
why do you even go to blogs, can't you decide what you like for yourself.>it doesnt matter what they think.
They give boyd rice albums 0.5 because muh racist nazi man :(Yet pharmakon is praised for doing what noise pioneers were doing since the 80s
>>55310489No no, the opening paragraph of this review is the worsthttp://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/1564-like-water-for-chocolate/
>>55310764>these are considered professional reviewers>there are people who blindly follow their scoresFuck...
>>55310760>post-irony meme>dumbfuck>full retard memelook d00d idk wtf ur saying, i'm just here to say Tool is shit ok? cos they are.
>>55310764Fucking shit, his is real. >http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/9464-shine-on/>Journalistic integrity
>>55310678Wow, you ACTUALLY believe these are similar? Have you ever actually LISTENED to Tool? Goddamn, if you think its too poppy, maybe you need to crawl out of your cave and stop listening to NMH
This is really when I stopped having any respect for p4k
some of you guys don't realize that some of the reviews were like ironic joke reviews before they were a serious review outlet.
>>55310554you have no idea what you're talking about, keep masturbating to your pseudo intellectual ego tripping sound waves.I think p4k are lazy with reviews to a degree, but they're used as a "guide" for a reason, it's not about the review, it's not necessarily about the individual scores either, it's their taste as a whole and the aesthetic they love, and you can definitely feel those things shining in almost every release they rave over and always have.when they say something isn't that great, they can be wrong, but when they say something is good, it's good.
>>55310885>before they were a serious review outletThis never happened
>>55310813
>>55310885does Brent DiCrescenzo's legendary Kid A review count?
>>55310900Filtered
>>55310900>but when they say something is good, it's good.Biggest drone on this board. Filtered.
This shit right here.The last paragraph of this review pisses me off so much>Sure, he sounds like he means what he's saying, but his esoteric words seem born more out of self-satisfaction than pleasing listeners.Really?
>>55310900>but when they say something is good, it's good.>mfw
>>55310918if you like tool you're probably the same strain of guy who thinks dave grohl is talented
>>55310900>but when they say something is good, it's good.Thanks for saying this. Now I can filter you for good.
>>55310973>>55310942i enjoy pretty much all bnmd albums, why is that such a sin
>>55310988Strawman ActivatedWhy do you hate tool so much? Cause mu told you all tool fans are euphoric?
>>55310988LIVING OOOON THE EEEEEEEEEEDGEEEE
>>55310874that's not pitchfork
>>55310764Top fucking kek
>>55310900>They said Beastie Boys was good>They said Blur was good>They said Swans was good>Countless number of talentless monkeys get 9.0+
>>55310988Be honest, have you ever listened to any Tool album? And if you did say which one/s and please list which are their flaws in your opinion. Thanks
>>55311017no, because gimmicks like making music to the golden ratio is the most masturabotory pretentious show off shit i've ever heard of.i don't hate them, i just don't think they're that great.
>>55311044>swansgr8 b8 m8t
Sometimes you agree with a critic. Other times you disagree with a critic. The trick is to either listen to no critics, or listen to a few your trust. Eventually you'll know their preferences, and their biases, and can take them into account. Getting outraged about others opinions is pointless.
>reviewing music>bias guaranteedwhy do people read music reviews again? make up your own mind
>>55311073>the most masturabotory pretentious show offYou sure love to fill your empty and worthless statements with buzzwords>inb4 buzzword is a buzzword:^)
>>55311073Do you even Prog? Holy shit, Prog music is all about crazy shit like that. It's not "gimmicky". T-pain and autotune is gimmicky. Building an entire album around the golden ration, or and entire BAND on motherfucking CIRCLES is simply artistic expression. Youre just mad that Maynard is more talented than you.
Anyone got all those Kiss reviews, where Destroyer is given like 10
>>55310685>Popular music is automatically good music
>>55311105you can't negate the fact that they take themselves WAY too seriously
>>55311149>you can't negate the fact that they take themselves WAY too seriouslyIt's part of the act. Do you know anything about prog?
>>55311148>Popular music is automatically bad music
>>55311137>Artistic expression>technical talent>"becuz its muh sophisticated prog music, and not crazy nigger music its justifiedkek
>>55310372That was retarded. I don't know how you can justify a 0.0, especially when the actual review never indicated an objective reason for disliking it. If you already hate a band that most other people who actively listen to new music like you just shouldn't review them, that's not what reviews are for.
>>55311149>they take themselves WAY too seriouslyIT only looks like that from their concepts, when in reality they are goofballs like Devin Townsend and MastodonEven Opeth and Porcupine tree are really nice guys
>>55311175>Being critical on popular music is automatically perceived as hating said music
>>55311148Are you actually retarded? Nice reading comprehension. I've never stated or implied such thing. >>55310634 asked how can people genuinely like tool and I've simply listed several things which prove their success. I've never said shit about their music's quality. Learn to read.
>>55311186I'm still hoping you're just trolling
>>55311149Even if they are pretentious, why does that affect the music for you so much? Art in itself is pretentious if you strip it down enough.And come on, you obviously have something against them and loathe them. People who just don't think they're great' don't go around telling people not to listen to them.
>>55311204>Not being critical on popular music is automatically perceived as loving said music
I know you guys are trying to prove a point but I just listened to Schism and it sounds like progressive SOAD, please don't do that again.
>>55311208This guy >>55311148 is not me
>>55310973Holy shit can I save that pepe?
>>55311269>Tool was funded in 1990>Soad in 1994Ayy...
I love that album.... such a harsh score...Well i gotta respect the opinion of the reviewer though! each one and his own opinions
Their Kid A "review". I'm a huge radiohead fan and even I agree that it's the most pretentious thing i've ever read.
>>55311291Sure it's all yours
>>55311291>asking to save a file
>>55311316That doesn't mean anything to me or the way the song sounds.
>>55311186>>55311149>>55311073>Mixing the art and the artist 100% pleb
>>55310907>Fedora to dislike toolare you having a fucking aneurysm?
>>55310372ThisNow the public opinion of that album is skewed incredibly negatively because of one idiot who years later even admitted he was a complete idiot about it
>>55311370I assume it's because anon was afraid of stealing someones work
>>55311269fuckin lol
>>55311389>Le tool are fedoraI've seen em livee twice and there were no people wearing fedoras/triblys.
>>55311342That review was dead on and they basically coined the term Mallgoth from it, which also describes that album.
Tripfags and namefags are cancer
>>55311269i just went and watched the video for that and for some reason i lost my sides three minutes in when the dude falls completely still
>>55311370>Not asking before saving rare pepesIt's cause of pieces of shit like you that I have to watermark em
>>55311477>>55311370>>55311423>>55311291>>55311347hello my fellow redditors. hahahahaha le dank maymea.
>>55311493wew lad! dank counter-meme ;^)
>>55311057I can answer this. I've listened to lateralus and 10kdaysKeenan is an immature conspiracy theorist fuckwit who writes absolute bullshit 2deep4u lyrics on par with a hippie first year college kid. As the for the music itself, it's nothing special just competent prog metal. Although it gets boring real fast when you realise they use the same distortion effects and gimmicky rhythmic progression over and over, and then there's the healthy dose of throwaway shit like Lipan Conjuring, not to mention the tracks with overly long repetitive sections like wings pt 2. Basically, Tool is all "style' no substance, and is pretty much pseudo-intellectualism given sound form.
>>55311535fuck thisno fuck it i'm done i'm leaving this dumbass corner of the internetit's really fucking nice out this week
>>55311555>Keenan is an immature conspiracy theoristMight be true but still art=/=artist>who writes absolute bullshit 2deep4u lyrics on par with a hippie first year college kid. That's subjective. Also his lyrics are objectively no 2deep4u since you can find the same concepts in several religions.>Although it gets boring real fast It's drone, what did you expect?
>>55311555Nice trips. NOw, I understand what youre saying, but TOOL also serves as an easy, entry-level prog band. Sure, its not the greatest, but that doesnt mean its not good. If not for too, I would have never actually gotten in to prog.
>>55310954Rage boner
Tool is literally a radio friendly version of meshuggah
>>55310764To be fair, Jet IS monkey pee.
>>55311678fuckin lol
>>55311633>Also his lyrics are objectively no 2deep4u since you can find the same concepts in several religions.You're right. His insightful lyrics are on par with the teachings of fucking Siddhārtha Gautama. How could i have been so stupid, he makes allusions to vague religious concepts, he must be a genius! Hey, Jesus is the son of God. Now I'm a 2deep4u master mind as well. Fuck you.>droneFucking seriously?>>55311647ok fine
>>55311741>Implying Tool isn't just a drone snoozefest Look at this pleb
>>55311741>Expecting him to analyze complex religious shit in his lyricsHe's simply hinting to these concepts. The averagee listener might even get curious and check em out. You can't really expect him to describe complex shit, especially when it comes to these subjects.
>>55311769Everyone see this shit? It's shit like this that makes the board suck so hard. Just so you're all aware.
>>55311476I just got to the bit with the tiny hand and fucking lol why the fuck did they think that was a good ideaThis is like ayyy lmao the music video
>>55311808How about expecting something authentic with poetic merit and integrity, instead of "MONKEY KILLIN MONKEY KILLIN MONKEY PIECES ON THE GROUND OOOOO HUMANS ARE THE REAL ANIMALS" "TEN THOUSAAND DAAYS IN THE FIIIIIREE IS LONG ENOUUUGHHH" bullshit
>>55311634that disclosure review always kills me. what a shit band
>>55311823Oh, the irony. You've been shitposting with your opinions which are worth less than trash for the past half an hour.
>>55310707you're right. they should have given it a 10 like the writer wanted to
>>55310307fucking Jenny Death review was made on purpose to piss people off, its literally shit
>>55311876>inb4 you listen to Kanye and you think that's the real poetry Go on and post something with poetic meritAlso>Cherry picking lyricsYou know that's not exactly how it works right?
>>55311897you're right, we should stop posting opinions and discussing music and just go back to memeing on each other again
>>55311876the lyrics you posted are fine Right in Two isnt that good though
Ready to get memed?
>>55311920angels on da sidelinesbaffled n amusedy da father give dese niggas free willnow dey all confused n shit
>>55311935:(
>>55311441>having seen Tool live twicewhy?
memefork part 2
>>55311935>As an album, Kind of Blue is unimpeachable, the kind of record you look forward to listening to decades down the line. As a reissue, this anniversary package (expensive at $109.98) is nice but less than essential, best for completists or those with good record players to put the new vinyl pressing to good use.I don't see a problem here.
>>55311951>trying to b8 me with a distorted Tool lyricI gotta admit you're a pretty clever troll. 6/10
memefork part 3: the memeining
>>55311951>Dat Tool lyric K E K You almost got me as well. Good effort tho.
>>55311951haha
memefork part 4
Memefork part 5
>>55311974>Implying justin bieber was the real shame in that list>Chief Keef, Tylor Swift and Frank Ocean Hello? Is this the How to be a Plebian 101 class?
Memefork part 6
>>55312060Yep, they're all terrible.
>>55310683
would just like to thank everyone itt for the rare pepes. is it ok w/ you if i save them?
>>55312139Yes, they are all yours now.
>>55312139Go ahead, they're all yours my friend!
>>55312139sure man just give me credit :^)
>>55310683Andrew W.K. sucks though.
>The Unbearable Whiteness of Indie
>>55311017>>55311057Not the guy, but I've listened to a few tool albums. It's not that bad, but come on. They are a joke, and their fans are a joke.
>>55310683I don't the Pitch is all terrible by any means, they have a good few writers under their belt.But fucking hell if I ever had to pick out a person that was a definition of megalomaniac, it would be Ryan Schrieber and you can pretty much sense it in all of his old reviews.Especially the ones he gives bad grades to.
>>55311901Yep. Fucking Mark.
Remember that shitty teen-pop girl group that got a 7.2 earlier this year?
>>55310307Arctic Monkeys-AMgave it somewhere in an 8 and the review is basically just shitting on their previous albums.
>>55312178best pepe i have ever seen.ty
>>55310900>you have no idea what you're talking about>if pitchfork says it's good then it's goodHoly shit are you a new trip? Generally the trips on /mu/ are at least a little bit smarter than this.
>>55310333i don't like pitchfork but I love that they hate prog.
>>55310988Lol what
Regarding Tool.. at least they have Danny Carey. That guy's crazy. I saw him play drums with Primus last fall and he killed it. Most of the drum parts on Tool's songs are pretty cool to listen to
>>55310307thats a terrible band though
No.55310307